Silence vs Music

We hear it everywhere, (if like me you listen to music) don't stop the music, turn up the music and so on, so forth. But why? Why does the world insist that we have something to listen to? Is it for the simple reason that the artists who make music want money or is it because without it people would have nothing interesting to do and say?

I am afraid of silence. There I said it. I agree it is sort of weird to be scared of  such a innocent thing, and whilst I can go without hearing anything and I won't get fidgety and anxious or scream or anything, I don't like silence. Silence is a raging and out of control fire that licks at your soul until you are bare and exposed. When silence hits me, my ears tune into anything that is making a sound. I hear a stick crack, a bird jump from branch to branch, my silent breathing becomes concise and defined. I reach for my phone, my iPod any form of sound making thing on me, if I don't have a technological device I click, hum or just tune into any sounds around me.

Sometimes I go for a walk, and it gets quite silent. My ears tune into the surroundings. The most beautiful thing that happens is that by doing this I instantly get relaxed and can forget the world for a moment. I listen to the crunch of grass blades as they are crushed under my heel, I listen to the birds making their song, and imagine the words of a song I know inserted into this space. Life is truly complete when we can accept and acknowledge the little things that make our world an amazing and stunning space that is at our feet.

I recently bought a new iPod (a white 64gb :) and because I ordered it through the Apple Store online I received a free engraving. I chose the quote:

'Music is Perpetual, only the hearing is intermittent'

This is a quote by I can't remember who, but I am sure that if you googled it, you would find it :).  To me this quote couldn't be more true, we can choose whether we want to hear the music or not, and to always hear the music is something I have promised myself to do always.

My music taste: I love all music really, anything from screamo to indie, heavy metal to pop. The only thing I ask for is a topic that matters. After this, everything will come into perspective. Of course everyone has their own opinion of what topics matter and what doesn't so all songs are beautiful to their own individual audience. Recently however, I have found myself listening to indie and hip-hop/rap. Completely different genre's I know but they just connect with me. Anyone who says music is not educational has not listened to a good rapper. A good rapper uses new and exciting vocabulary that challenges it's listeners and introduces them to new ways of speaking. Indie is just the soft music and the music that relaxes me in every way because it seems as though it is picked and derived from the environment around us.

Getting back to the topic: Silence vs Music. Who wins? Obviously Music. You may think that my opinion is slightly biased as I am afraid of Silence, but I'm sure many, given the opportunity, would choose music over silence. There is something out there in music for everyone, something to sooth or work up and it has been proven to be good in many different circumstances.

Circumstance 1: 'Helps' you lose weight and stay motivated when working out.
Circumstance 2: Allows you to express your true feelings without being violent, putting your feelings on the line or making a fool of yourself.
Circumstance 3: Proven to be of great help to patients with depression and/or anxiety.

Just 3 cases where music is helpful to you and everyone around you. So take the advise of David Bowie, and 'Listen to the music'. :)

                                                                                                                                       Maddy x

Mistakes.

What defines a mistake? If you look up the definition on google you get this; An action or judgment that is misguided or wrong. But I dont find that quite accurate. I believe it it more like this; An action or thought that when proven to be wrong is a learning curve. I think everyone should learn from their mistakes and instead of looking back at them as the thing you did wrong, you should look back and think "yeah, I did that wrong but if I hadn't of I wouldn't be who I am today. Thats what all kids do when they are in the early stages of their lives, they eat dirt, don't like the taste then don't do it again. I think that children and babies are actually the smartest people out. They enjoy the simplicities of life and have all the friends of their class/daycare group. They don't care what others think too much and they aren't shy to state their mind. But us, in our old and intellegent, sofisticated and mature minds don't do this because it would be wrong. Too bad I guess for those hundreds and thousands of people out there who are just like you and do not want to speak their mind for fear of being a minority. They do not want to make the 'mistake' of putting their true sleves on the line to say what they feel and do whatever they want because, who knows? They may just loose their job because of it, become a accidental celebrity and have their 15 minutes of fame all for the wrong reasons, this cannot be any more true. I am guilty of this, I never say or do what I feel because, I guess, thats just not the done thing. If I were to know everything I said or did was annomus then I would go about living life to the fullest and filling out my bucketlist and not see anything as a mistake, ever. But, I lack courage. I have done such things in the past and ended up with a lot of mistakes and regrets and actions and sayings that I cannot undo, cannot re-live, cannot think about in more detail. I have learnt that this is not how society works and how us, as the 'generation of the future' are the underdogs who always have to make the rest of the world believe, trust and most importantly, acknowledge us for who we are. Winston Churchill once said:

'"No comment" is a splendid expression. I am using it again and again.'

 Well, do you know what Churchill? So is the rest of the world, we are constantly sitting on the fence and becoming the invisable to society people who, as soon as a foot is stepped wrong will have their backs stabbed and their friends turned into enemies. I was watching T.V. the other night when an advertisement for a comedians show came on. I was watching as he said:

'"Why do chickens alwyas walk as if they are walking in a minefield?"'

Then continued to engage in a rather funny looking but very true representation of a chickens walk. Perhaps we don't give chickens enough credit. For they are the ones who have realised that a small step could have their heads chopped off and their bodies served up for dinner.

                                                                                                                                      Maddy x

Cold

Today I write about the cold. It's not ging to be your average run-of-the-mill blog about the weather no! This is a rant about cold weather. Let me just begin, by telling you my story: For the past 4 years I haven't experienced a winter in Australia, as such, because I normally go north (toward the equator) during the normal winter/dry season/whenever cold weather is around (about May - October in the southern Hemisphere and October - May in the Northern hemisphere) and that gives me a lazy 27*C every day with nice sunny weather and long days at the beach and pools. The end. I have recently had to come back from the beautiful, sunny, warm, idylic weather that is Broome because of circumstances I care not to disclose. It's FREEZING!! Perhaps it is because my blood has thinned or something but still, there is no reason the earth should be this cold. Whilst I probably do need to get a bag of cement and 'toughen up princess' I am still doing my best to rug up and try -to no avail- stay warm and do excercise. Yesterday I had a thick scarf, a bamboo shirt (it is a soft and warm fabric made of Bamboo similar to a wooly silk but not quite the same), two thick jumpers, leggings, thick trackies, woolen socks and Ugg boots also gloves and ear-muffs. I was still cold. I went in to see my old boss and she said:

"Oh, have you put on weight?"

Me: *:O* "Nah, I am just wearing loads of clothing and I stopped short of wearing thermal underwear." Which, might I add, was true. That night I didn't go out for my normal nightly jog at 5pm to keep up my fitness and make me stay nice and warm because it was too cold and my mother said I might catch a cold. News - I have a cold anyway. So as I write this I am wiping a snotty nose, wearing much the same clothes as I did yesterday, rugging up in 2 thick doonas in a heated room, sipping a hot chocolate and eating Tim Tams (an Australian delacisy). I am wondering what I can do to get out of this cold and back into the warm weather without having to leave my humble abode or escape my doonas which have been ever so kind to me these past few days. Any suggestions? Please let me know in the comments belowww. Meanwhile I will continue to freeze in this cold cold place they call a town and await your cmments. Have a cool day! I know I will be.

                                                                                                                                   Maddy x

Don't know...

 So today is exactly what i'm thinking no overly deep metaphorical babbling just me. As of late i have been listening to the music that suits and reflects how i feel at the very moment i am listening to it and it varies from idie to rap, reggae to country. Every tune and word lingers well after the song has finished and i am still trying to find the true meaning and find how i relate to that song, but after many hours of thinking how this could mean that or that could mean this, I give up. I then wonder, is that how i go through my life? Do i work so hard on something only to just give up? Everything i do is it ever for a purpose or is it just the selfish satisfaction i get from doing something, if for anything, for me. When i give advice do i trust it, the person i am giving it to obviously does but if i was put in the same position would i trust and obey my own instructions? Somehow i don't, i guess being the only person in my life who truely knows how, what and why i think and act, i don't. It is this self-doubt that tells me everything i say is a lie, a joke, an act. How does one over come such a hurdle? Break this haunting habit? I can't.

 With this, once again, leads to another thought (when does anything not?); what i've done, what i will do, and how i will/have go about it? Everything i have done, for as long as i can remember, i have thought long and hard about something, planned a mini speach in my head on the invisable paper that floats around waiting for something to be noted, then not said a word of it, instead saying what i know people want to hear, what will make them happy and reassured. Every thing i wanted to say being flushed down the toilet never to be able to be let out of it's prison cell that is my mind. From then on, i think about what i should have said, what i should have done and everything i wanted to do but didn't. In this same way i think about the future, what i want to do, how i want to do it and everything that will stem from it. Nothing ever happens. I want so bad just to be acknowldged as the girl who did what she wanted without thinking, but in a way, i am like the things i wanted to be said -locked in a body that does not seem like the one that matches the mind. Because of the person i have become, anything i do has to be thought of carefully, the repercussions, the things i want to do but can't make my body carry out the actions. How will it impact on everything else in the world? This sounds big as if i'm the biggest slice of pie on the plate, bit instead i am a tiny speck of dust going about what seems to be a pointless adventure.

"Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safetly in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used, extreamly worn out and loudly proclaiming - "WOW, what a ride!".

My intention is the latter but it seems the best i can manage is the former.  Somehow everything i try and control, i can't. Can't. That word makes me shiver, because, for some unknown reason i don't like the way everything shuts down in my face, dreams and futures and past's gone with the mention of that one word. Can't.

                                                                                             Maddy x

Friends

WOW! so with quite a few of my last blog's they haven't been quite that inspiring or uplifting and I am very sorry for that, my blog's are just a conscious stream of thought about what is worrying me, making me happy etc. Today's blog (as you can clearly guess by the title) is about Friends. Lately I have been lucky enough to make quite a few new friends, just by striking up a completely random conversation and smiling and being friendly because the truth is nobody in this world wants to be alone no matter how much they try and say so, they don't. Anyone providing they are not in a hurry or doing anything in particular will be happy to strike up a conversation about anything and everything, and if you are looking for a relationship you might just be able to use one of those famous pick up lines you have swarming around in your head ;). Some people just don't get the fact that i have just stated, they think that people will think they are weird and judge them straight away when they are honestly very good people, so even though part of this is true and first impressions do last it's not that bad! I have a friend who is like this; she constantly thinks she has no friends, even when she has so many she just doesn't care to notice, she thinks that people will think she is weird if she asks for their number when she has known them for a whole term and has been sitting and conversing with them daily! I have told her to just ask because the worst thing they can say is 'no' and then they will soon forget about it anyway! She just can't bring herself to do it, which is such a shame because anybody would be really lucky to have her as a friend because she is pretty, smart and so trustworthy! To all you people out there like this I encourage you to take a deep breath and go for it! Just start up a conversation, talk that guy/girl you have always wanted to, ask for a number and just go out and live life to the fullest! Because after all;

"Sometimes your only available transportation is a leap of faith"
-Margaret Shepherd

Maddy x

Death

Nobody like's it, no body wants it, many are scared of it. I am one of those people who are scared of it, although read my first blog and you will see i am slowly getting over that. It seems though that unless you are scared of it you never really think about it until it comes knocking at your life's door. You might see the occasional person in a hospital looking really ill, then get told that they were to absquatulate soon but you never really care profusely until a family member, close friend or pet dies.

I get that it is one of those things that happen to the young and old, poor and rich, famous and beggers. But I don't get why. Why does life have to be so unfair to take the ones you love away from you, to take something you loved with all your heart and then just destroy them? Occasionally making them suffer and try and fight with the pain until their heart gives out and they are left at their final resting place with only memories of the pain that they endured and the way everyone will remember them being a sick and sad valetudinarian.

I would like to just say now that this is something that has become close to my heart recently. I do not wish death on anyone especially the people I love, afterall, everybody is someones brother, sister, daughter, son, uncle, aunt, mother father. I do wish that if i could do just one thing before they died, i would grant them their one wish in the world and pause time just so i could do this, then tell them how much i loved them, but of course isn't this what every one wants to do for a loved one?

Kind Words

I figured I am always going on about how i would like the world to be a better place and how every one should act in order to achieve this so i should just re-enforce that view with a quote then maybe I may be rid of it from my system. The quote is:

"Kind words do not cost much but they accomplish much".

Well this is completely true apart from the first half that states that kind words do not cost much. -They cost nothing at all! and who knows you might just gain something. I know at work I have to use manners and be nice to all the customers otherwise my boss will fire me, but I do it anyway because it makes me feel better not being rude.

Tonight at my basketball on one of the other courts (not my game) a girl got a tech foul for swearing at the umpire, why swear? It shows a lack of vocabulary and poor use of language, not only that half the time it is used out of it's context. I know different people will have different views on this and i acknowledge and accept that but honestly?, Do you like when people swear at you and say mean words to you? I know I don't, it brings ones self-esteem down and makes people self-conscious about everything they do. How would you feel if you said something mean and derogatory to someone then the next day you found out they committed suicide? It could have been because of what you said and now you have potentially just killed some innocent person who is someones brother/sister/mother/father/daughter/son/cousin/aunt/uncle/only friend.

All I ask is stop with the nasty words, I sound like a Nanny here but, don't say something if you haven't got something nice to say. Whats the point of it, there isn't one. While you may not be like me and being nice may not make you feel better, it will make you look better, you will have strong will power and appear smarter.             -Be nice!-

                                                                                                   Maddy x